Uptown C Train:
Conductor: This is 81st street. Get off here for the big museum of dead stuff.
7 Train Subway Platform:
PA announcer: Ladies and gentleman, we remind you to please be considerate of other passengers, and please keep your bags off the seats. I am karate trained, and will clear them by force if necessary.
E Train, 7th Avenue Station:
MTA conductor: Near the rear doors, in the blue shirt and black tie, get your saggy stomach clear of the closing doors! 5th Avenue is next.
Downtown 6 Train:
Conductor: Once more, ladies and gentlemen, things that should not be in the doors when they are closing: heads, shoulders, knees or toes, no purses, arms, or slow companions.
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